Since July though, I've grown and matured a lot more and begun to relate much more to Lana's lyrics. After listening to the entire album in full about fifteen different times, I eventually grew to like it. this wasn't a forced thing, like I felt I had to still support her even if it wasn't genuine. I just realized I really enjoyed hearing a new sound and a bit more positive,upbeat lyrics, in stark contract to the dark undertones of Ultraviolence and Born To Die. It makes me so happy and encourages me that Lana came out of a very sad, lonely, and depressed state of mind, and has now found real peace and joy after so long.
Inspite of her terrible experiences with drug, alcohol, abuse, and disappointing love life, she has managed to come out of the fire stronger, sweeter, and bolder than ever before. One of the songs that really strikes me is "change" . I am so transformed into a totally different world, of new beginnings, second chances, and a newly found golden hope. "Change is a powerful thing, people are powerful beings. I can feel change coming in me. Maybe by the time summer's done I'll be able to be honest, capable, of holding you in my arms without letting you fall when I don't feel beautiful or stable maybe it's enough to just be where we are." These lyrics are so powerful and inspiring!
Especially during this season of my life, I find such truth and gold in them. I am on a journey back to myself, God, and the world, to reconnection, love, and freedom. I too am striving to again be honest and capable and vulnerable with those I love, without fear of rejection or abandonment. It is not easy for me to do, but I am learning to let go of my fear and give in to the healing power of love and acceptance and forgiveness. i am learning to be gentle with myself, patient, and take it as slow and easy as I need to. I am learning to relax, surrender, give in, and accept outcomes that are no longer in my control, but in the control of the Universe. I pray and I hope that God has a much better plan than I can possibly imagine, and I anticipate the day I will understand why my life is how it is right now.
A couple other favorites of mine are "Thirteen Beaches" and "White Mustang"
These two songs particularly struck a chord with me, reminding me of a man I once loved and truth be told still do:) Lana discusses her struggle to get over a past lover, and her unwillingness to move on from something she thought would last forever. But eventually she comes to the realization that she could not change her boyfriend, that it was up to him to save himself and to seek help for his evil ways. She persisted in loving him unconditionally, regardless of his struggles/ shortcomings. But she eventually had to come to the point of self-esteem and leaving a relationship that was too one-sided, where she was no longer receiving any love/recognition. I identify with these two so much right now,in my extreme confusion, loneliness, and indecision. I want to move on and accept that some people are not meant to grace the walls of my heart/life forever, but part of me still longs to see them again, to regain the bond of love we had, if only for such a short, bittersweet time. How do I let go of someone I thought was my whole future? How do I let go of someone who give me a reason to live again, who challenged, encouraged, inspired, and drove me to reach higher and to love bravely and persistently? I do not have the answers yet, but I am searching, seeking, and in the meantime, enjoying these beautiful ballads.
Finally, I adore "Lust For Life" and "Love", maybe more so than any on the album. I believe this is primarily because I am unused to Lana belting out such carefree, fun melodies and I invite this rebirth/change. I love turning the volume up to max and driving in the country, singing at the top of my lungs to these empowering lyrics. When I am feeling stressed out, anxious, or worried I usually make a point of popping the lust for life cd in my car's player:) I mean I just find it so amazing and wonderfully inspiring that Lana has come out of the dark tunnel of alcoholism and depression to be reborn as a healthier, happier, and self-assured woman. She is confident in the person she has become and believes in herself, and her abilities to change and recover from painful life experiences and bad decisions, to reach out to those around her and share her newly found hope.
" I get ready, I get all dressed up
also, isn't her little wink and dancing towards the end the cutest thing you ever saw?:)
I just love seeing her so happy and relaxed.
Can we talk about the album artwork too? I mean, how cool is it?
I love the daisy chains in her heart and the cool vintage rev's and green truck in the background. It just really contributes to the overall mood of the album and it's themes.At first, I vividly recall being shocked that Lana was smiling I repeat" SMILING" right on the front cover. If you know her and her usual style of music, you'd understand why that is such a change. She has discussed before in interviews how when she looks serious or sad, she is often just thinking and contemplating. Although obviously a good portion of the time during her early teen years and during her flight to fame, it was a legitimate depression. To see how far she has come since those lonely, dark nights is such an encouragement to me, having recently been struggling with mental illness, depression, and passively suicidal thoughts and actions. she is living proof that one can change if they really want to and have the bravery to seek help, as Lana did through therapy/rehab.
Well, that was my personal take on this work of art. Please Let me know in the comments below what your first impressions were of Lana's latest album:) I'd love to hear from you and welcome a variety of opinions/ideas about her music.
